FIFTY SHADES FUNNIER?

WORD ON THE STREET! FIFTY SHADES IS HOTTER.. SEXIER.. FUNNIER!?

Not perhaps what filmmakers may want to hear for a movie set to stroke the loins of Valentine’s Day moviegoers?

Here is the story.. Reviews are beginning to circulate like blood through a body online.. The FIFTY SHADES DARKER film, much anticipated, is getting showered with mostly golden reviews..

Such as this from DEADLINE:

Director James Foley gets exactly what this thing should be about, and though it is slavishly faithful to the rather pedestrian details of the book’s storyline (the script is by author E L James’ hubby, Niall Leonard), Foley knows what he has to deliver and, together with cinematographer John Schwartzman, comes up with the goodies as the camera explores every pore of his stars’ nubile bodies. The first film was trying to be something more ambitious, and though that was admirable, it lacked the romance-novel tackiness that is hidden just beneath the surface of James’ prose. That said, there still is no one scene in Fifty Shades Darker that can touch the first film’s “negotiation” sequence. But this outing doesn’t apologize for being exactly what you would expect, and it has strong production values that lift it up

And this from the NEW YORK POST proclaiming the inside story on the actors in the film practiced marathon sex romps with instructional photos of squat routines:

The cast of “Fifty Shades Darker,” however, would be wearing far fewer clothes than her other celebrity clients. The sequel has Christian and Anastasia exploring the more romantic side of their, ahem, arrangement (the characters famously sign a contract in the first book and movie, with Anastasia agreeing to be the submissive and Christian the dominant). The film, which UK newspaper the Sun says is even kinkier than the first flick, reportedly includes a racy bit in which Anastasia draws lipstick on Christian’s chest and sex scenes that are “too graphic to describe.”

For her role, Johnson needed a lean and graceful physique. Dornan, on the other hand, needed to be able to hoist up that lean and graceful body during the steamy shower-sex scene the trailers keep teasing.

But then there is this.. an honest review that gives an honest portrayal of what exactly AUDIENCES think–not critics, not experts.. but people who actually saw the film. I don’t think the makers of FIFTY SHADES would appreciate a laugh track with the film, but it developed in one screening.. and perhaps nationwide more than one screening will have the same reaction..

From the HOLLYWOOD REPORTERS, a potentially HONEST assessment of the new film:

Leonard and Foley offer enough semi-naked sex scenes here to prove that quantity is no substitute for chemistry. Both leads are attractive and look good without clothes, but the roteness of their bulge-flexing intimacies is such that when, near the film’s end, the movie showed off Mr. Dornan’s physique in a gym scene, women at Wednesday’s preview screening were openly laughing at the contrivance.

There was a lot of snickering at that screening, in fact, though some scenes inexplicably slid by without mockery. Where were the guffaws when Ana described cunnilingus as “kinky f––kery,” as if it weren’t an integral part of modern-day, plain-vanilla lovemaking? Where were the scornful hoots when Christian, in response to Ana’s comment, “I didn’t know you had a place in Aspen,” quipped “I have a lot of places”? Especially in this Trumpian era, can we not at last openly mock such one-percenter smugness?

Trump era politics.. pop culture.. and fifty shades darker than the rest.

For those who want romance will they only find humor? Laughter? …Trump era one percent smugness?

The box office awaits the arrival… it’s darker than ever before.

BATMAN WILL SPANK

The BATMAN LEGO movie is coming out this weekend as well–stiff competition for FIFTY SHADES DARKER.. and the BAT is expected to win the box office!

Tracking suggests Lego Batman will take in north of $60 million for Warner Bros. Animation and producer Dan Lin. More bullish box-office observers believe the spin-off will even approach or clear $70 million, considering The Lego Movie, directed by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller, debuted to $69.1 million over the Feb. 7-9 weekend in 2014…. as for FIFTY SHADES? … Projections show the follow-up earning $30 million-$40 million in its U.S. bow.

SOME RELATED READING

If you’re a bit bored by FIFTY SHADES fiction, maybe reality will spark some interest.. reality like this 

Human foxhunts are an esoteric fantasy, even for the sexually adventurous BDSM crowd. Many involve corseted dominatrices chasing their prey through woodlands, their submissive quarry eager to be caught. The stalking takes place across the world — recent hunts were held in England, Australia, Florida and California. It’s a niche but growing area of female domination (femdom), where (mostly) men pay for the right to be subservient. But interested parties can’t just show up. To join the hunt, you must fill out an application, come with a recommendation and have an established presence in kink communities like Fetlife. For genuine submissives, working for it is part of the process.

Read more here should you want to learn …